How do I know when I’m ovulating?

Warning… raw content included in this post!

Apparently this whole conception thing is a whole lot harder to figure out than expected!

Anyone else leave school feeling like they only had to look at a boy wrong and they would magically be pregnant??! All through my twenties I carried a huge fear of getting pregnant. I worried that if I forgot one pill then I was doomed!

19 years I lived on edge clinging to that tiny pill as my shield against getting pregnant.

But now…

Now I want a family. Now!
And it’s not as easy as that…

First there was the anxiety about coming off the pill and fearing what it would do to my moods and emotions. But, oh my goodness… I actually came alive and started to have dreams and desires again. I settled into a long but ok cycle, much supported by Clue’s tracking app.

We deliberated so much over whether getting pregnant was a good idea… We weighed up the pros and cons, but we kept coming down to the deep seated need to start a family. The first time we started having unprotected sex I felt terror and fear over how I would cope. I was also feeling naughty like a forbidden act was taking place.

When it didn’t happen that first month there was an edge of disappointment but also a little relief that we could try again next month… this naughtiness was pretty good fun!!

Second time around I was hopeful as by this time I’d figured out how to roughly guess the “right time” but we still had lots more sex than usual. After a bit of odd bleeding… surprise!!! We were pregnant. Two blue lines!

Then the worst happened and we found out firsthand that miscarriage is more common than you know.

In the aftermath I agonised over when/whether to try again. The fears of not being a good mum resurfaced and I trotted out all the doubts again. But then we also remembered that hopeful and joyful feeling we felt on seeing those two blue lines.

It was very odd not knowing where I was in my cycle. After living by the cycle for so long I now had no idea if I was coming or going? We knew we had to wait for a negative pregnancy test before starting again and after a rather vivid dream we were on. In that first week it was more about being close and sharing our love, a healing balm against the sorrow and grief.

But then I got to thinking… what’s this ovulation timing thing? I’m not one to sit around wondering so I did a lot of googling and asking the ladies on twitter.

Basal Body Temperature?


I got enough answers to be able to have a go at figuring out when I might be ovulating…

I’ve dabbled in taking my temperature every morning for the last three weeks. I did have to clarify with @me2mummy over just where to measure my temperature!!! So far I’ve discovered that I’m way warmer than her and up and down all over. The weekend saw a dip and then back up after a few days but I’m not convinced I’m getting good readings or that there is a “normal” pattern.

I also bought some OPK tests (Amazon Link) which are supposed to detect the hormone that signals/stimulates egg release. These initially were picking up the residual HCG from the miscarriage but they faded and went to nothing for a bit.

So I was a lot in the dark still about where I was… and then…

Then… the desire… omg!

It hit hard on Friday… The twitter ladies got a treat and a new tradition is being born #fridayfriends! Basically an ogle fest of nice blokes to look at! It certainly cheered me up as I was stuck at Brighton station!

But I desperately wanted to get home and… well you know…

Hubby has been pounced on at every opportunity since. Can’t get enough! I just have to kiss him and…

So I took an OPK test and was actually very surprised that it was negative. Hmmm. Oh well, better safe than sorry hey?! I got so disheartened that I didn’t take an OPK test on Saturday. Did one on Sunday and there it was… a positive OPK… perhaps there IS an egg on the way? I have to admit to doing a funny little jig in the bathroom and my heart started racing!

The desire was through the roof anyway so there was soon more of the good stuff going on. And boy it was good! There is definitely something extra, perhaps even primal, about baby-making sex! On Monday we even got in a sneaky one before he headed off for work!

Part way through the morning I got this text message…!

“Sex is definitely not good for you in copious amounts… I just went to make the tea and nipped to the loo whilst the kettle boiled… then I went straight back to the office completely forgetting. **** reminded me so went back and did the tea but not without almost putting the kettle in the fridge!” love from Hubby

Oh my goodness I nearly fell of my chair laughing. I’m loving the fun and closeness that’s happening right now. I’ve missed quite a lot of this over the years thanks to the hormone pill. The emotions on natural hormone cycles are also much more intense. I feel so alive.

So my theory at the moment is just to enjoy life and go with the flow of the desires and perhaps we’ll get lucky again naturally. It’s been interesting trying things out and it’s helped me to get a handle on where I am roughly in my cycle after miscarriage. I don’t want it to rule my life though. Surely my body’s signals that it wants sex are the best indicators??

I hope so.

Any insights on reading my chart so far would be greatly appreciated. 

OPK tests (Sunday, Monday AM, Monday PM, Tuesday) – they’ve faded a bit.

Rhyming with Wine

17 Comments Add yours

  1. A very honest post. This made me think back to when we were trying and it took 2 years! Enjoy it but don’t worry if it takes longer than you want. We take so long trying not to get pregnant then we want to get pregnant and it seems to take ages… x

    Liked by 1 person

    1. RawMum says:

      Thank you. I’m glad you got there in the end. We got our first pregnancy so quickly but sadly it wasn’t to be. It is amazing how things turn on their head!

      Liked by 1 person

      1. Oh I’m so sorry to hear that. It will happen and I wish you all the luck in the world. X

        Liked by 1 person

  2. Firstly, I am so sorry for your loss 😦 I hope you’ve experienced much healing, even though I know pain will never fully go away. I’m so intrigued by the female body and how its reproductive system works, even though I don’t plan on having children! And yay awesome sex! 🙂 Best of luck with tracking and with getting pregnant again! 😀 xx

    Liked by 1 person

    1. RawMum says:

      Thank you. Human bodies are indeed amazing things. 😜 I’m sure to be posting about the next chapters. Fingers crossed for a good result while we are on holiday. That would be amazing but totally not expecting anything. Not even sure if I’ll take any tests with us. 😊


  3. I remember the exact same feeling when I left school. Turns out I knew very itle about my own body and its cycles. I have 3 gorgeous children now, but it took a while. I de-stressed my life, changed jobs and read “Take control of your fertility” by Weschler. It explains how to read the temperature charts and other indicators. Although you will never look at egg white in the same way! Good luck. #pocolo

    Liked by 1 person

    1. RawMum says:

      The whole CM tracking thing is rather icky. Plus how do you tell if it’s all mixed in with semen? TMI I know! I’m not sure I can cope with the stress of the temperature thing. I’m not worried that my temperature is not rising but it’s probably the crap thermometer rather than anything else. Must banish stress. 🤗


  4. Trying to conceive is such an anxiety inducing time! I remember this with my first as she took quite a while! Thanks so much for sharing with #Blogstravaganza xx

    Liked by 1 person

  5. Crossing our fingers for you lovely. I’m afraid I don’t know a thing about basal temperatures or those funny stick things.You learn something new everyday lol. Thanks for sharing with the #DreamTeam xx

    Liked by 1 person

  6. keepmum says:

    First time round, after being on the pill a good long time, it took a little over 12 months. My cycles have never really been cycles, they do as they like. I don’t think I ever saw a positive OPK and I tested pretty much everyday !! Id even given up doing pregnancy tests and was advised to do a test because I needed a jab, went home and did the test- needless to say I cancelled the jab appointment XD
    you’ll get there, all in good time! good luck and happy… you know! #blogstravaganza

    Liked by 1 person

    1. RawMum says:

      Luckily I’ve had four regular ish cycles before the miscarriage so we know things are working. Just hoping that things are back on track. Glad to hear you got your result eventually. I trust it all went well after that? 😍


  7. It’s a mine field isn’t it? It can be such an anxious time and having lived through the heartbreak of losing a pregnancy I can totally relate to your emotions. It certainly sounds like you’re having fun now though!! Come on little egg! #marvmondays 🌺

    Liked by 1 person

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